He was a big big Italian fellow who happened to carry a LV or Gucci man-bag around. In the bag was always a huge wad of cash and a gun. Well, I was the only person brave or stupid enough to constantly make fun of him about his man-bag. I made fun of him so much that he grew to like me and ultimately decided to his buy cars from me instead of the other sales guy.

Well, let me just tell you how hard (let’s call him John) John was to deal with. If he wanted a car, you had better be sure you had it, and if you didn’t, you better get it before he shows up or a scream-fest would follow suit. I recall sitting in my office chair and getting a call from John:

John: Do you have my lime green Lamborghini yet?
Lizard: No John
John: Look down at your chest

I looked down and there was a red dot on my chest.

John: I’m across the street pointing a rifle at your chest, get me my fucking lime green Lambo

…then he slammed the phone down

That was just the many times I had a gun pointed at me by John who had more guns than the US military and I am not even coming close to exaggerating.