It started a little over a year and a half ago when I first met Nick. He invited me over to his house to meet with his roommate, a very well-known porn star in Florida that we will call Stephanie. Nick has also coined her the nickname “Party Favor”, as you can pass her around like she is a party favor. The girl LOVES sex. I don’t know a single man that has met her (besides Nick) that hasn’t had sex with her. Bear in mind that it’s not Nick’s fault that he hasn’t had sex with Stephanie; his girlfriend lives with him as well and is best friends with her. If you have ever met Nick’s girlfriend, you would know that having sex with her best friend would be a quick shortcut to getting your dick cut off and thrown in the woods like John Bobbit.

Stephanie really isn’t my type of girl. It is a well known fact that I have not hooked up with a girl without fake boobs unless I was too drunk to realize the boobs were real. Even then, the boobs would have to be large enough to justify my drunken brain thinking they were fake. That being said, Stephanie does not have fake boobs or large boobs, but when a girl has had that much “fun” you have to at least give it run once or twice. That in addition to the peer pressure aspect, everyone else was doing it so why the hell not right?

So I walk into Nick’s house and see two things immediately: Stephanie and beer. My brain leads the way until I get drunk and then The JewC takes over the thinking. So I went to partake in some motivational juice, also known as beer. I think she half expected me to do what ever other guy does in her presence: pounce on her, **** her brains out every which way, and then get dressed and leave.

I think she took the fact I wanted to have a few drinks first as a sign of respect when it was really just a sign of alcoholism. The way I put down beers sheer excellence. If they made drinking a sport I would be like Mario Lemieux from the penguins: the owner, the player, and the coach! Anyway, in the hour I sat and drank with Stephanie I got absolutely plastered.

I did not initially intend to get plastered, I just planned to go to the house, have sex with Stephanie, and then leave. It was Nick’s fault for having beer in the fridge! I had my CCW on me at the time and when I went in for the kill started putting the moves on Stephanie, she felt it and asked what it was. As usual I was a bit too drunk and took her question to mean that she was interested in the weapon. Not realizing that she was actually scared shitless of it I pulled it out, removed the mag, unchambered the round, and handed it to her. Apparently she was terrified while I was too drunk and horny to have noticed.

When I sensed things were going South, I decided to bail out of there. I called Nick and expressed my disappointment, although I am not sure if he could understand my slurs. I know that now, after a year and a half of knowing him, he can understand my slurs just fine, but back then I don’t think he realized what I was capable of. I went home in defeat having been the only man Stephanie had ever turned down in her entire life.

This story is continued here: Stephanie and Beer become Jersey and Bowling