30
30
Use to email this story to a friend, post it on Facebook, or anything else you can think of.
28
LV Lizard and PimpC Party for the First Time
One of my first pimp clients (before I actually knew pimps existed outside of the movies) was PimpC. Now Pimp C wasn’t the first pimp I saw in my store, but he was the first one that was my client. Let me tell you something, the weed smell on PimpC was the strongest smell you have ever smelled in your life. It was a constant smell; as he treated weed like it was legal. He’d just walked up and down the street puffin on the strongest weed that god let grow! PimpC had lived in Cali but had a nice penthouse in South Beach so PimpC got his weed FedExed to him from Cali. I kid you not, one time he cracked open the lid on a tightly packaged box while in my office and and the smell stunk up my office for over a week. The shit was that strong!
Anyway, here’s the story about my first night out with PIMPC!
PimpC invited me out to go to very well known, high-end, hard to get into club with him. I of course didn’t know how exactly a pimp rolled and was a massive idiot who brought my girlfriend (at the time) with! Well we pull up and valet at his condo and ride the elevator to the top. Before we even got to the top floor you could start smelling the weed! The second the elevator doors opened, the weed smell and smoke rushed in making both me and my girlfriend cough (yes, that much weed) There was no furniture in the whole condo except for one couch. There were three women sitting on the couch in literally NOTHING; I mean butt naked! I immediately cursed myself for Read the rest »
Use to email this story to a friend, post it on Facebook, or anything else you can think of.
27
Welcome to LV Lizard!
Hi there and welcome to LV Lizard. Before you begin reading through my stories of sex, porn stars, pimps, car sales, and of course general drunken debauchery, I would recommend that you take a few minutes to read the two links below to better understand who I am, where I’m coming from and why they call me the LV Lizard.
Use to email this story to a friend, post it on Facebook, or anything else you can think of.
27
Crackers For Breakfast
I went on vacation to Louisiana with a female friend of mine. I did it for a few reasons; one of which was to party my ass off on Bourbon street and the other was because she thought we were in a relationship and wanted me to meet her parents. She was good in bed so i had no choice. I knew she was a goodie two-shoes when we first got together, but I molded her into a perfect freak in the sheets. She warned me that her family was very religious but I didn’t think anything of it. We partied throughout the weekend and on Sunday morning I was awoken at 7:30am for church (after going to bed at 6). I begged and pleaded for sleep to no avail. I stated out of respect for my own religion (Judaism) that I shouldn’t have to go to church. She insisted that if I didn’t go it would crush her and disrespect her family, so I decided I’d go.
At the time I was into wild, Versace type shirts so I picked the least wild one, a zebra print silk shirt that screamed look at me and a pair of dress pants. I put on a tie that didn’t even come close to matching, but I was told I needed to wear one. I looked ridiculous, I was massively hung over, tired, and starving. The only thing that kept me awake Read the rest »
Use to email this story to a friend, post it on Facebook, or anything else you can think of.

